 |
|
         |
And so we come to the penultimate episode of Shamewich. It's going to be sad to end this one whenever we have to move on. Hopefully we'll run into this rascal again for even more webcomic-based shenanigans.
Wouldn't that be lovely?
I realized something profound about myself, something that I could only find out through the magic of chicken slammer sandwiches and cheese-covered wedges at my favorite wing place. Fuck traveling into the deep jungles of eastern Asia or daily meditation. That stuff is for pussies. Real epiphanies of the self come from sliding greasy chicken products down my gullet and then leaving the waiter a shitty tip because his breath was, like, super bad. If you want some fulfillment in your life, I would suggest that you go no further than a Hooters, Wings N' Things, or even a Wing Stop (only if you must). This is where Christ is found, in snack bars.
But what I discovered about myself came from bearing my soul to friends. I admitted to them that one of my top sexual fantasies is to be Star Wars' Princess Leia being ambushed by storm troopers. Being ambushed in a very sexy way, of course. Maybe instead of "ambushed," I should have said "invaded."
For me, there's nothing that could possibly top that. The uncertainty, the fear, the fact that I'm being plowed by men wearing huge masks. It's got all the classics going for it. Throw in the cinnamon buns on the sides of my hair, a little help from R2-D2 opening up my "ports," and Chewbacca watching in the corner, and you've got the ultimate sultry scenario. After telling this to the people I was eating with, my brother chimed in with "Set phasers to anal."
And that's when it hit me. What I discovered about myself after discussing this topic is that I, by all means, am a complete waste of life and contribute nothing to this planet.
You know, the kind of person that starts a webcomic.
Love and Light (and Leia),
-Cale
|
|
All content is © 2007 by Abomb Nation, Inc.
All rights reserved
|
|
